“The most encouraging thing anyone has ever said to me about my church family was, ‘It’s quite hard being a couple in this church.’ [smile… audience laughs] I was thrilled, in a very ungodly way.”
Does that sound confusing? Ed Shaw rejoices in the fact that his church focuses so much on singles that married couples feel like they are on the outside. Who is Ed Shaw? He’s a contributing author to The Gospel Coalition and to 9 Marks. Here is what his profile says on 9 Marks, “Ed Shaw is the pastor of Emmanuel City Centre in Bristol, England, and part of the editorial team at Living Out. He is the author of Same-Sex Attraction and the Church: The Surprising Plausibility of the Celibate Life (IVP).”
Living Out is an advocacy group for those identifying as LGBTQI+/ (attracted) Christians endorsed by folks like Tim Keller and Russell Moore. As part of the editorial team at Living Out, Ed helped write and promote an audit called “How Biblically Inclusive Is Your Church?” This was released at Living Out’s conference in 2018, which Tim Keller headlined. In his explanation and promotion of the audit, Ed Shaw asks those in attendance to take the audit back to their churches and ask their leadership teams to use it. He calls all churches to apply this audit and then address the issues it exposes. Church leaders need to examine whether or not these statements are true about their church. He believes these statements are biblical, as the title asserts. While there might be some grains of biblical truth scattered about through this audit, they fall upon the hard pack of unbiblical assumptions rooted in Mark Yarhouse’s false teaching.
This false teaching asserts that people don’t change, that those identifying as LGBTQI+/ should not be pressed to change their sexual identity. This is the view of Living Out and Revoice (See right-side panel “More Info”). To call non-heterosexual people towards heterosexual norms is oppression of sexual minorities. In fact, this is the sum of statement #10 on the audit. We are to answer “True, False, Not Sure” to the following, “No-one would be pressurised into expecting or seeking any “healing” or change that God has not promised any of us until the renewal of all things.”
This helps explain why Ed’s church has such a robust “singles” focus on those identifying as LGBTQI+/. None of them must be pressured towards heterosexual norms. In the video, Ed comments on this 10th statement, “really important I think that we can write ‘true’ to that one.” He then purloins those who would encourage anyone (I assume he’s not just thinking about sexual sinners) to get “just a bit of counseling” so that they then can be “perfect like Jesus.” Such a course of action would be “very damaging” to people. I agree… if such an approach was being taken. No one I know, like, say Stephen Black, and First Stone Ministries, has ever taken such a flippant course. This is a straw man argument.
Why must the church refuse to pressure those identifying as LGBTQI+/ toward repentance from same-sex attraction? In an article on Living Out guiding parents’ engagement with their same-sex attracted children, parents are encouraged to “Normalize It.” Explain that everyone sins, and guard against “the assumption that being ‘straight’ is the normal sexuality which they are deviating from.“After all, “‘straight’ sexuality is equally fallen from God’s good original created purposes.” I am unsure why the term “straight” deserves quotation marks. Perhaps there is some connection with Living Out’s cautious endorsement of Lisa Diamond. Punctuation marks make or break doctrine. The words themselves, however betray a deviant belief. Heterosexuality, (one man for one woman for life) is the normal sexuality God designed. Why would parents, enjoying a healthy God-given blessing like marriage, tell their same-sex attracted children, “Our marriage relationship, our sexuality is just as bad off as others. Our sexuality is all equally fallen, pedophiles, transgenders, monogamous husband and wife, polygamists, adulterers. Incest, bestiality, sodomy, and marriage between one man and one woman for life… all equally fallen.” Sexual sin is sexual sin, but to say there is no distinction is to deny the Scriptures. God did not turn idolaters over to faithful marriages in their rebellion, but to the LGBTQI+/ lifestyle (Romans 1:18-32).
The approach of Living Out and Revoice is understood from the personal struggle of men like Sam Alberry, Ed Shaw, Nate Collins and many others. They understand great personal sacrifice in their endorsement of the “single, celibate” approach for Gay Christians (or Same-Sex Attracted Christians). They always include a disclaimer in their books and conferences which affirms the Biblical model of marriage, and the sin of any sexual activity outside of marriage. It would seem at first blush that their defense of traditional marriage legitimizes their prolific musings on singleness and friendship. However, the church is being called to repent from calling LGBTQI+/ (attracted) Christians to repentance. These folk are thought to be no more deviant than the pastor and his wife who have been happily married for 35 years. Heterosexual, monogamous marriage is simply NOT for LGBTQI+/ (attracted) Christians. They need the church to help them “flourish” in their homosexual singleness. To call them to anything else would be to “victimize and diminish them“.
In fact, Nate Collins at Revoice has called the church to repent of thinking too much of God’s design for the family, for this oppresses sexual minorities in the church.
Is it possible that gay people today are being sent by God like Jeremiah to find God’s words for the church to eat them and make them our own? To shed light on contemporary false teachings and even idolatries, not just the false teaching of the progressive sexual ethic, but other more subtle forms of false teaching? Is it possible that gender and sexual minorities who have lived lives of costly obedience are themselves a prophetic call to the church to abandon idolatrous attitudes toward the nuclear family toward sexual pleasure? If so, then we are prophets.
So we’re back to Ed’s original quote, “The most encouraging thing anyone has ever said to me about my church family was, ‘It’s quite hard being a couple in this church.’ [smile… audience laughs] I was thrilled, in a very ungodly way.” We must give full weight to his assertion that the statements of Living Out’s audit are biblical and #10 is most important. “No-one would be pressurised into expecting or seeking any “healing” or change that God has not promised any of us until the renewal of all things.” Marriage is only for one man for one woman. Marriage is not for LGBTQI+/ (attracted) Christians. Marriage is forbidden to them. This good gift from God must never be offered to them as a possibility in their future. Angels of light preach doctrines of demons. Consider 1 Timothy 4:1-5,
But the Spirit explicitly says that in later times some will fall away from the faith, paying attention to deceitful spirits and doctrines of demons, 2 by means of the hypocrisy of liars seared in their own conscience as with a branding iron, 3 men who forbid marriage and advocate abstaining from foods which God has created to be gratefully shared in by those who believe and know the truth. 4 For everything created by God is good, and nothing is to be rejected if it is received with gratitude; 5 for it is sanctified by means of the word of God and prayer.
Marriage is not salvation. The Bible says that singleness and marriage are good gifts from God. No one should just get married just because. A LGBTQI+/ (attracted) Christian affirmed in their attraction, never called on for repentance, never stirred up to seek healing, would make a very poor spouse indeed. But there are many LGBTQI+/ (attracted) Christians who have repented, who have been healed, and who make better spouses than a lot of heterosexual fornicators. Why? Because they have been washed, they have been sanctified, they have been justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and in the Spirit of our God (1 Corinthians 6:11).
If we forbid marriage where God has offered marriage, we preach doctrines of demons. Paul wants Timothy to be on guard, and to serve the church not by forbidding marriage, by denying healing, by relegating God’s gift of marital sexuality to equality with all sexual deviance, but by alerting the church. Consider 1 Timothy 4:6,
In pointing out these things to the brethren, you will be a good servant of Christ Jesus, constantly nourished on the words of the faith and of the sound doctrine which you have been following.
